A Blossoming Hope: Our Adoptive Journey to Taiwan

We Moved Up to #9 on the Waiting list !!!

2011-12-07T14:59:00.001-08:00

Our case manager just called, and we moved up on the waiting list! The good news did come with some other news, not bad, but just news. We found out that the government of Taiwan is enacting a law that has a waitlist registry for babies. June of 2012 this will go into effect and make it so that a baby has to wait 45 days before it can be adopted internationally.

The goal of theirs is to promote domestic adoptions, which is great for the baby. We appreciate the fact that their government is truely realizing the need for these babies to be saved instead of aborted as was previously culturally common.

We still feel that changing a cultural norm for a whole country won't happen soon enough to effect us THAT much, so we are still keeping positive and hoping for the best.

~Jen

We MOVED up on the Waiting list !!!!!

2011-10-05T07:50:00.000-07:00

As of yesterday at approx 4:37pm when our case worker with our adoption agency called us to update us for our monthly updates. She said I have "Good News that we have moved up to #10 now on the birth mother waiting list". A little adorable baby girl that was orn on the 20th was just referral to a family and accepted so she will be 4-5 months old depending on the court process and they only had been waiting 10 months since on the waiting list. So exciting for that family and so extremely excited about moving up...

keep fingers cross for this to keep on moving...
it's another step closer to our lil taiwanese cutie to arrive...

~Jen

Shipped Our Adoption Photo Album to our agency ~

2011-08-12T14:45:00.000-07:00

Birth Mother Photo Album

Scheduled Delivery: 19-August-2011

Shipment Detail

Number of Packages:

1
UPS Service:

GROUND

Weight:

2.5 LBS

Reference Number 1:

Adoption

Reference Number 2:

Approved by Chris (my mommy)

We ordered this photo album through Apple. They did a hard cover and did a great job. Love it and I sure hope they love it too.

Front Cover of our Photo Album:

More pictures to come ......

~Jen

We got our photo album ~

2011-08-08T11:56:00.000-07:00

Well this morning after I got home from an appointment I saw the package at the front door. Yep our adoption photo book we created is here. We will look it over and send it to our Taiwan social worker at our adoption agency so she can send this to the orphanage where our birth mom is waiting to pick us...

~ Jen

Adoption Photo Album ~

2011-08-04T18:08:00.000-07:00

Jose and I been trying to do this photo album for months now and we finally sat down last saturday evening and did it all in one night. WOW !!! It I am sure will turn out amazing and wonderful ! Can't wait to see it , we ordered it though APPLE and they said we should have it by Aug 8th, 2011. So once We get it and look it over and I will take pitures and post them along with this post.

to be continued ......

~Jen

TECO ~

2011-08-04T18:06:00.000-07:00

Our Case worker told us she was sending our TECO application out and some of our documents to get translated. So once we get those back we will get an email saying they arrived I believe.

~Jen

We are Finally on the "Waiting List" ~

2011-08-04T18:04:00.000-07:00

As of Today @ 11:30am I received a call from Our Adoption agency case worker and she informed me on what's next and to tell us we are #11 on the waiting list. YIPPIE SKIPPY !!! SOOOO EXCITED !!!

We are now in the waiting for a Referral peroid !!!

Fingers are crossed for a sooner then later referral !

~Jen

We GOT our "Letter of Approval of favorable Determination from USCIS" ~

2011-07-30T07:44:00.001-07:00

We have been waiting for this since we mailed it back in the beginning of June 2011. They received it June 6th, 2011 and completed it July 21st, 2011 !!!! Whoooo Hooo we now are able to become adopting parents without any issues. We have contacted our Taiwan case worker to let her know and we are ready to move to the next step. THE NEXT step is to send some of selected documents to them with photo album and the fee's that are needed at this point also to get on the waiting list !!!!

Once we are on the waiting list for the birth mother program we have 9-18 months til the REFERRAL of our child. Once we get the Referral we have 4-6 months to plan travel and make arragements to go pick up our child... CAN"T WAIT !!!!

Soooo excited ~

Fingers crossed for a sooner then later Referral !!!!

Jen~

USCIS got delivered today ~ yep tracking info below....

2011-06-03T13:59:00.000-07:00

Proof of Delivery

Close Window
Dear Customer,
This notice serves as proof of delivery for the shipment listed below.
Tracking Number: 1Z48747W0240946385Service:UPS 2nd Day Air®Shipped/Billed On:06/01/2011Delivered On: 06/03/2011 1:54 P.M. Delivered To: LEWISVILLE, TX, US Signed By:FINCHER Left At:Dock
Thank you for giving us this opportunity to serve you.
Sincerely,
UPS
Tracking results provided by UPS: 06/03/2011 4:57 P.M. ET

USCIS

2011-06-02T16:25:00.000-07:00

Well yesterday we sent out documents to the USCIS to get our dossier for our adoption. We sent it UPS. YAY !!!! I am soo excited. We also have to send some stuff to get state certified which is $10.00 per document which is about 6 pages needed. Once we get the approval from USCIS and the 6 pages state certified we will sent it to our Adoption agency with our Waiting list money ! OMG WE ARE ALMOST THERE.. Once we get our dossier we are going to Apply and Apply to as many grants as we can.

Fingers crossed for a quick turnover from the USCIS because it can take anywhere from 30 days to 3 months !!!!! WOW .. yep that long..

waiting ......... to be continued !!!!

~Jen

Certificate Of License for our Homestudy is Notarized and FINAL !!!

2011-05-25T16:19:00.000-07:00

YAY, We got all our notarized copies of our Homestudy in the Mail today fed ex'd to us !!! whooo hoooo !!!

we are So excited and now going to going to move into the USCIS stuff and we are ready to ship that paperwork out and the cashier's checks from my parents when they are ready.

Another step closer like I said to our BABY TORO !!!!

~Jen

Taiwan Flag ~

2011-05-21T12:27:00.000-07:00

Dear Baby Toro:

2011-05-21T12:11:00.000-07:00

Mommy and Daddy and Furbabies are so extremely excited for your arrival. We get more and more excited each day and after each completed thing/item of this Adoption Journey we are on to bring you home ! We have so much love to give to you and also all the grandparents and great-grandparents and rest of the family !!! I know you will be scared coming into a whole new world and culture but we will keep your culture at hand and keep you learning it daily and Mommy and daddy will be learning with you ! Daddy is going to school to learn your language already since jan of this year. SO we will be a bit behind but we will catch up at our pace. We are just so excited and filled with joy knowing that we will have you to hold and cuddle with and go for walks with the furbabies and us. Can't wait to introduce you to MICKEY & Minnie and gang at Disney world in orlando florida which isn't far from us and Your Grandparents (McGarvery's) have a vacation club so you will get to see them all the time. You are going to be So spoiled with love and happiness and anything else. We already have alot of stuff figured out for you and your wellness. We want you to become the best that you can become and we are going to get you into the best schools so you get GREAT education because that is Very Important to us and our upbringing on our Child which is you ! We decided that we will be traveling every 8 years back to taiwan so we can keep an extra special place in your heart and we will learn new things everytime we go. We are hoping to travel around when we can. we love you so much and the furbabies are so excited and can't wait to meet there brother or sister..

Love always and forever,
Mom and Dad and Furbabies

Mailed Our With Eye's Wide Open Book ~

2011-05-21T12:10:00.000-07:00

Just mailed it Priority Mail flat rate with confirmation !!!! Mailed it at 2:17pm...

So exciting !!! can't wait !!!

Another Step Closer to BABY TORO !!!!

~Jen

We have officially FINISHED our WITH EYE'S WIDE OPEN BOOK !!!

2011-05-21T08:34:00.000-07:00

We are sending it off in the mail today !!!! YAY !!!! we are so excited this took us around 15-20 hours to complete.. WOW but it's all worth it and it was very informational also !!!

~Jen

Next we are moving into the USCIS in the next week or 2... just waiting for our notarized copies of our homestudy report..

HOMESTUDY REPORT FINALIZED AND COMPLETED ~

2011-05-19T17:51:00.000-07:00

We got an email on May 17th at 4:54pm from our adoption agency letting us know we are Completed and APPROVED for Homestudy and we are ready to send it all to USCIS... HOW EXCITING !!!! I was at work and shared my joy with my co-workers and then of course facebooked it !! lol ... gotta love facebook it leaks it to everyone else !!! it was a very good day ~

So we are waiting for our homestudy report copies that are going to be notarized to be sent to us so we can move on to next step sending the stuff to USCIS... yippie !!!!

~Jen

"Eye's Wide Open" Book~

2011-05-10T20:52:00.001-07:00

As we just Approached our end of this 169 page book. What a fun and enjoying process and it was nice to interact with things and understand where they are coming from. It's a whole different world out there and I know we will bring a wonderful loving and happy child home to us. So we can spoil the crap out of it !!! yippie !!! I can't wait to be a MOMMY !!! I Know Jose is so excited to Be A DADDY !!!! we have come so much more loving and closer with this whole journey it's awsome.. My hubby is the best and I would never ask for anything else, he is a great daddy to our furbabies and he adores us all and we sure love him and miss him when he is away on business !!!

miss you jose !!!

~ Jen

Homestudy report almost finalized by Adoption Agency~

2011-05-10T20:46:00.000-07:00

We ran into some revision's that had to be made from our Homestudy Social worker, also we had to get 1 thing clarified. Well since that is done, we are meeting our Social Worker Sat for 3 hour visit since our one visit didn't count back in 2010 we had. YEP, we have to have another visit with her. Hit a little road block.. But NO PROBLEM we are going to get right through this. Nothing is stopping Jose and I as we are so determind to get our "BABY TORO" in our hands sooner then later. YAY !!! Just can't wait !!! we have came so far it's unbelievable !!! AMEN !!!

Our meeting is this Saturday May 14th, 2011...
~Jen

Homestudy report DONE ~

2011-04-28T17:26:00.001-07:00

Yes, we finally got our Homestudy done and FINALIZED by JUST the homestudy case worker.. it was finalized after our review and corrections last night around 11pm we received a GO from our case worker. So our homestudy sent our final homestudy report to our ADOPTION agency for there case worker to review and let us know that's it's a GO to send it to USCIS.. OMG, I can't believe we have finally gotten this far.. YIPPPPPPIE.... so awsome to know we are driving along the road and another step closer to our BABY TORO !!!!

~Jen

Homestudy report getting finalized by the Director of our Homestudy agency~

2011-04-26T18:17:00.000-07:00

Waiting for the homestudy report to come to us from our director of our homestudy and will then once she is done reading it, then we will get to review it and then it gets sent to Adoption agency for FINAL approval before sending it to USCIS for our Dossier.. YAY !!! ALmost to home strech for the WAITING LIST !!! yipppppppie !!!

~jen

Phone Call from "The Taiwan Case Manager" from our Adoption agency~

2011-04-26T17:55:00.001-07:00

Our TCM called us literally right as I was pulling out of my parking garage from work. lol she was calling to introduce herself and find out what stuff as for paper work is done and so forth. we are way ahead of the game pretty much and she said we are in a GREAT PLACE with our paperwork. YAY !!!!! keep it moving that's all I have to say.. As she told us what needs to be copied and notarized and even state certifited. So we are printing things we need and coping also and sticking it into the Baby Toro Adoption Binder !!! So this way when it come to the day we need to send out our dossier stuff to USCIS we have everything in order and all signed and notarized and state cert and ready to mail it FAST !!!! vrooooooooooooooooom !!! lol ...

keep fingers cross for good timing for the paper work to be done !!!
~Jen

Certificates are APPROVED for our Edcuation classes we had to do for our Adoption ~ Date that was suppose to be posted: 3/25/11

2011-04-14T17:41:00.001-07:00

Below are all the classes we have to go through and do exercies and test/evaluations:

Adopting the Older Child
Medical Issues in International Adoption
Let's Talk Adoption has been approved
The Journey Of Attachment
Finding the Missing Pieces: Helping Adopted Children Cope with Grief and Loss
Conspicuous Families

They have been all approved and sent by email to our case worker with our adoption agency and to the social worker and director to our homestudy agency !!! YAY !!! WE ARE COMPLETELY DONE WITH OUR HOMESTUDY CHECKLIST AS OF NOW !!!!

YIPPIE !!!!

~Jen

Minnesota & Indiana Background checks ~

2011-04-14T17:24:00.000-07:00

Well I was told the monday after our Homestudy visit that since we are going by the rules of Hague accreditation, we have to do background checks on the states jose and I have previously lived in if any. Since jose remained in floirda he only had to do florida. So I have lived in Indiana and also Minnesota(born and raised in minnesota). So I did that and Indiana came back fast. Got IN clearance on April 2nd, 2011. Just got my Minnesota Clearance today APril 14th, 2011. The Minnesota took about 2 1/2 weeks and I had to pay $20.00. SO WE BOTH ARE ALL CLEARED FOR DCF in the states we have lived in !!!! YAHOOO !!!! Still waiting for Our homestudy report to come to us so we can send it to our adoption agency so they can over look everything and approve it and then it comes back to us and we send it to USCSI with our $750.00 and wait for there appt to get FBI fingerprinted again and to finalize our adoption so we can adopt internationally.. SO EXCITED !!!! Can't wait till it gets to that point.

~ Jen

HomeStudy visit today ~

2011-04-02T16:43:00.000-07:00

YE, we FINALLY had our Homestudy visit again, this time things are moving right along !!! YAY !!! we got all our paperwork in and she checked off everything and now she just needs to write a homestudy report on us. It should take 1-2 weeks to be completed. Then we have to mail everything from our homestudy to our adoption agency so they can review it before it goes to USCIS for our finalization for our Dossier !!! OMG this is so getting closer and closer.. we are just so excited and relieved !!!

Here is some pictures of My furbabies waiting for the social worker to arrive ~

Bella:

Jewel & Sakura:

What a great blessing !!!

Now just waiting to get our Dossier~

~Jen

ADOPTION PLANNER is here ~

2011-03-25T08:33:00.000-07:00

Well when I got home from work on Monday March 21st @8:00pm. We found UPS dropped off this wonderful package from our adoption agency. We opened it and were SO SO SO excited. More fun stuff to READ... YAY !!!!

We are so excited, there is just so much more in life by creating wonderful memories through this amazing journey !!! We just can't wait, as things are getting done and paid for, it brings us so much more closer to our baby toro to come home. I am so grateful for my step dad and Mom for giving us this beautiful gift of life. Can't thank them enough... just thinking about How we are going to really be parents to a baby (since I have 4 furbabies)if an great feeling and joy of tears...

Here is a picture of our adoption planner on the side, we can't post the book because of the privacy of the adoption company:

Adoption learning education courses online~

2011-03-24T19:08:00.000-07:00

Yep tonight we finally completed them, I started them this morning around 7am and we just finished them together and taking all the test at the end. It was a great educational experience. I am so excited and being able to know what to expect and how to expect things for the most part really eased things. We are SOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED for our child, WE can't wait. The girls even listened to all the courses with us... They can't wait to meet there brother or sister *_*

We are just waiting for the approval from the adoption learning education online to review it and send us our certificate of completion.

It was a long day but very educational !!!

YAY !!!

~Jen

DCF clearance and FBI fingerprinting came back ~

2011-03-24T18:58:00.000-07:00

Funny enough they both came back on the same day March 18th, 2011 @ 8:23am got an email from our adoption agency director. I was at work and it MADE my day !!! I was so excited, to know that our DCF didn't take 2-3 weeks , and it only took 2 weeks. FBI fingerprinting came back in 72 hours since we did it on a friday !

~Jen

Scheduled our HomeStudy Visit ~

2011-03-24T18:57:00.001-07:00

We scheduled our homestudy visit for Saturday April 2nd, 2011 @12:30pm

We are so excited for this, because we finally have EVERYTHING completed and done and signed and notarized. YIPPIE !!!

~Jen

DCF mailed Monday March 11th~

2011-03-17T15:28:00.000-07:00

We are waiting for the DCF clearence and then we are all done. This takes from anywhere from 3-4 weeks.

Still waiting .....

~Jen

FBI fingerprinting Cleared ~

2011-03-17T15:11:00.000-07:00

We got our results on March 15th and we are CLEARED !!! YAY !!!

~Jen

FBI fingerprinting Done ~

2011-03-10T13:08:00.000-08:00

This morning we went and got our FBI fingerprinting done. What a relief to get that done. It probley is one of the fastest things on this adoption journey !!!

We also got our local background checks done and notarized today at our local police station. Also tonight we are going to get 2 more things notarized by one of my in-laws friends.

YAY, we are trying to get a hold of our social worker also to schedule a appt for her 2nd visit so we can turn our Homestudy stuff in.

~jen

Doing our Education parenting classes ~

2011-03-07T19:19:00.001-08:00

We logged in and signed up and paid for our Parent education classes ! Now we will read and take the test at the end and complete these soon.

YAY another task on it's way ~~~

~ JEN

Made our FBI electronic finger printing appt ~

2011-03-07T19:18:00.000-08:00

OMG, Yep we finally are here at the finger printing stage for the homestudy section of it. So this thursday march 10th, 2011 we have appt's for jose and I to have it done. Our home study agency will receive results within 24-48 hours. YIPPIE !!!

Emailed our social worker for our homestudy agency and asked her when we can schedule our 2nd visit to finalize everything, waiting for her to reply back via email.

Are going to fill out our I-600A forms so we are WAY ready !

Our Orientation packet papers should arrive today . Watching it with the tracking number ! yay !!!

So far things are going smoothly !!!

~Jen

Mailed our Orientation packet paperwork ~

2011-03-05T14:09:00.000-08:00

YAY..... YAY..... We have moved a bit forward and finished our orientation call and paperwork with it notarized and paid the fee. WOW !!! this is getting more and more excited each day !!!

~Jen

Orientation call went well ~

2011-03-05T06:07:00.001-08:00

Had our orientation call yesterday and it went well, since we just had read everything the other night,so it went smooth. We are going to send it via postal today fastest way and we paid our big chunk yesterday also. Sooo now we are going to be doing our final things for the home study and get that all done. Our social worker has to come back since it's been longer then a year.

Things are moving along smoothly and nice since we know what to do and when and what are due it makes things alot easier.

This picture below is when I was initaling the bottoms after we read them, mind you we already got things notarized earlier that day.

Sakura and Daddy reading the orienation papers, sakura was actually listening since she can't see. but it's still cute how good she was hanging out.

~Jen

We got our "ORIENTATION PACKET" ~

2011-03-03T08:51:00.000-08:00

WE received it yesterday UPS and when I opened it and saw it I got all choked up and started to cry of HAPPINESS !!!! FOR once I cried and it was bcause I was HAPPY !!! This is just the beginning our a GREAT JOURNEY !!! I am so blessed we got this far, I can't thank my Mom and Step dad enough for funding this, otherwise I don't know when or HOW we would be able to come up with the money. We just can't wait to do get all reading done and things signed and noterized and sent back with the fee's they require due at this return of our orientation packet.

What a great day it was !!!

It was also Jose's Birthday on march 2nd !!! BIG 28...

Keep the prayers coming !!
take care
~Jen

This is the EMAIL we got from our Adoption Coordinator Tonight.

2011-02-24T15:54:00.000-08:00

Email from our inquiry coordinator:

I'll review everything with social services. We should be approving your application at that time, and then I will send you an Orientation packet. After you receive the packet and read over the documents, I will schedule a call with you and Jen. The call will take about 30-45 minutes, and you will need to sign, notarize, and return the contracts in that packet. We won't process the contracts until we have the co-operating agency agreement, however once that is in, we'll accept your first payment. We'll then be sending you an Adoption Planner,which will have your next steps. At that point, I connect you with
your case manager, Kate, and schedule a call where she walks you
through the Adoption Planner. She'll also walk you through the rest of your process.

YAY ~~ this is GREAT NEWS !!! WOW, THe ICE has BROKE for US , FINALLY WE WILL START MOVING FORWARD AGAIN !!!

~JEN

We Finally Decided on Baby Names ~

2011-02-19T06:42:00.000-08:00

For Boy ~

Ayden Liko
Meaning:

(Ayden)Little Fire (Gaelic)
(Liko)Protected by Buddha (Chinese)

For Girl~

Khloe Mei-Lien

Meaning:

(KHLOE)blossoming (Greek)
(MEI-LIEN)beautiful lotus (Chinese)

~Jen & Jose and Furbabies ~

The Baby's stroller "THE BOB REVOLUTION" If it's a girl !!

2011-02-18T18:45:00.000-08:00

This will be the UDM (Ultimate driving machine for baby girl Toro ~ LOL )

The Baby's stroller "THE BOB REVOLUTION" if it's a Boy !!

2011-02-18T18:43:00.000-08:00

This will be the UDM(Ultimate driving machine for baby boy Toro.. LOL)

~jen

Baby Names Update ~

2011-02-18T18:32:00.001-08:00

Ok while my mom was in the hospital having outpatient, we were talking about baby names for boy and girl, they like KHLOE LYNN and not so much KHLOE Lien, but we do, but we also like Khloe mei-lien .. so the middle name will be decided later, but for the GIRLS IT"S going to BE KHLOE !!!

For boys we were thinking Liam but my step dad didn't really like how IRISH it was sounding. lol so we are still thinking boy names... I just love how they were getting involved in this baby stuff . It's so HEART WARMING and it just makes me SO SO SO SO happy and more excited. They are going to be the best grandparents, well who know's why my brother will have kids..

my mom and step dad love khloe and with a K because it's different then the normal Chloe !! I actually wanted that in the beginning but jose didn't like the K so much . But we convienced him and we are going with the KHLOE !!! YAY !!!!

~Jen

Writing a Terrific Dear Birthmother Letter~

2011-02-17T15:21:00.000-08:00

Writing a Terrific Dear Birthmother Letter
What do you write when the merchandise on offer is your heart?

by Nelson Handel

An ad. A brochure. A come-on. A notice of product available for transaction, trade, sale. A product. A commodity. Like a used car that's slightly dinged up, a little older than others, perhaps, but otherwise in fine shape. Ads are appropriate for used cars. But what should you call it when the merchandise on the block is the willingness of your heart? What do you write when what's at stake is the creation of your family? Let me backtrack.
My wife and I wanted to have a child. But after four fruitless years in the gristmill of infertility treatments (drugs, inseminations, in vitros, donor eggs), after exhausting our resources (physical, emotional, financial), after burying the monthly hope that our bodies would bring forth children, we accepted the fact that we are infertile. Biology has been quietly put to rest, a haunting memory.
But we still wanted to be parents. We always saw having a family as the next great adventure. So, we turned toward adoption, and as our hearts and spirits began to thaw, adoption filled us with new hope, a sense of possibility we thought still frozen and extinct. We’ll be Mommy and Daddy soon, we told ourselves, just one more gauntlet to run.
After examining our options, we decided to pursue an “open” adoption. We liked the idea of connecting with our birthmother, of having her choose us to parent her child, and of choosing her in return. To find prospective parents, we learned, birthmothers contact agencies or adoption attorneys, answer classified ads in Sunday newspapers, and, sometimes, surf the Web. Soon they find themselves reviewing what are known as “dear birthmother” (DBM) letters, documents that introduce the adopting couple and explain why they want to adopt. From these, birthmothers narrow their choices.
So we needed to write one, a DBM letter. Quite suddenly, we found ourselves trying to sell ourselves as parents and, just as quickly, realizing the impossibility of the task. Consider for a moment. If I asked you to tell me, with some measure of certainty, what your life will look like in five years, could you do it? Ten years? Eighteen? Will you still be married? Employed in the same profession? Living under similar circumstances? And how will you raise your child? Can you articulate a cogent philosophy governing the stages of life to come? Nanny, day care, or stay-at-home parent? Private school or public? When asked, who can truly predict more than their intention to live, love, thrive, and grow old in the most positive circumstances they can muster? This letter should be simple, right? “We're nice people and we'll do our best. What more can you ask?” Lots, it turns out.
In the early days of open adoption, DBM letters were single-page biographies. But the competition, if you can call it that, has heated up, and the number of prospective parents has grown enormously. For every healthy newborn available, there are now almost forty potential parents searching. Every type of family you can imagine—married, unmarried, and same-sex couples, single women and single men. It seems like everyone wants a baby.
Suddenly, gray pages of typewritten words look dull. After all, birthmothers live in the same media-saturated world as the rest of us. You have to stand out from the crowd, garner attention, make your pitch.
At first, people enlivened their presentations with a color photo or two. Things quickly escalated. With advances in computer power, digital photography, scanners, and low-cost color printers, these once-simple texts matured (some might say mutated) into well-designed, full-color presentations, corporate prospectuses for WeBeGoodParents Inc.
We were seduced. Both my wife and I have worked in TV advertising, so the process of communicating commercial messages is in our blood. This letter would be our brochure, the come-on to invest in Handels.com. People would buy or pass based on the image we projected, and we resolved to project the best.
We studied letters written by other couples and analyzed their approaches. How were they targeting the market? We coldly analyzed the “competition” and attempted to position ourselves in the field, capitalizing on our strengths (education, humor, compassion) and smoothing over our weaknesses (Los Angeles, working mom, forty years old).
We honed our pitch to the perceived interests of the consumer pool, and tried to be all things to all people. Could we be fun yet firm, stable yet fluid, Caucasian yet multicultural, urban but safe, Jewish yet Christian? How could we translate the left-coastal lifestyle of a couple of former artists into an archetypal American home? We’re urban cynics, but the sample letters were lush with what we termed Goo-Goo. Fill your letter with teddy bears, snuggles, and references to “tummy mommies,” the Goo-Goo school suggested. Be as cute and cuddly as you can; birthmothers are suckers for this. We found it condescending, but to be safe, we spread on some Goo too.
Then we chose pictures. Days digging through boxes. My nose? Her hair? What says “great parents” to you? Do we look happy or forced? Approachable or remote? Which picture makes our little house look largest? We even spent a day playing with our best friend's kids, taking cutesy pictures. Would they help a birthmother imagine us with children? We considered the subliminal elements and chose a cover photo where our arms formed a heart.
Without really thinking, we ran helter-skelter toward a picture of idealized parents that we believed every birthmother craved. We got high on a sugar rush of pop culture stereotypes, the sweetness of achieving something to overpower the bitter taste of reproductive failure. We would do whatever it took. We could succeed. We would succeed. We must succeed. We...stopped. And took a deep breath.
Our hearts were screaming like sprinters’ nearing the line, but we had been moving too fast to hear them. This wasn't right. We knew that.
The wonderful thing about writing is that the page becomes a mirror. As you fill it, it reflects all your imperfections, faults, and foibles. Our first drafts showed us an insincerity born of trying to win a game that had beaten us for too many years. We had been infected by the culture; our desire to parent had been transformed into something mercantile. This wasn't how we would find our child, the one who belongs with us, the one whose family we were meant to be. We were disgusted with ourselves and with the whole proposition.
Suddenly those sample letters we’d read so critically shone with different light. Our hearts went out to the couples just like us, struggling desperately to articulate their innermost yearnings. It wasn’t a competition; it was kinship. And the birthmothers, we learned, weren’t the indigent teens we had stereotyped, but were of diverse ages, differing education, and varied circumstances. Women who, perhaps in the same sure way we knew we wanted a child, knew, that at this moment, they did not.
We began again. We set out to communicate something authentic, some measure of essential truth about how we are in the world and what we might bring to the life of a child. We tried to put into words our love and longing, our deep, primal desire to raise a family, to witness the growth and flowering of a person and share in his or her life. We embraced anew this imperfect process and struggled to say simply what we desperately felt. We wrote the truth as best we could. In this way, we felt, we would connect with the child we are meant to have. If we weren't perfect people, well then, so be it. Some open-hearted woman would see us for who we are and entrust her child's care to our strong circle of love.
But in a culture intoxicated by BabyGap and JonBenet, is it possible to communicate anything as simply held and deeply felt as the urge to parent? Despite our best intentions, our artless letter was colored, photo-retouched, and lasered. It had to, or it wouldn’t look real sitting in our attorney’s stack next to 60 others.
As we handed him the final version, we thought perhaps the medium is no longer the message. If it were, our dear birthmother letter would be as unadorned as our hearts’ desire. Instead, our message ended up carefully produced to appear as authentic as it is. Though the truth is naked, its messenger went forth clothed in the emperor’s finest.

Tips on making the best profile from a website I found ~

2011-02-17T14:14:00.001-08:00

To find out what makes a profile work, I talked with birthparents and adoption counselors. Here are their best tips:

1 Inject humor. Include an amusing anecdote or funny photo that shows that humor is one way you deal with life. "They had a picture of the whole family wearing 3-D glasses and watching fireworks, "recounts birthmother Kelly. "This family had a good time just being around each other."

2 Show something unique. Have a horse? Show it. Bilingual? Write a few words in your second language. You want to differentiate yourselves from the others in the stack. "The mother I chose proposed to her husband at an NFL football game on the big scoreboard," says Jessica. "I liked her chutzpah."

3 Find balance. Let potential birthparents know that your life is full enough that you aren't depending on a baby to make it "complete." "I didn't want my baby to be the one thing that saved these people from a life of misery," explains Sara, so I passed on them." Yet, don't make it seem so full that you would have no room for a child. Shelly recalls one couple she didn't choose: "Both people had high-powered jobs and were involved in so many things that I just couldn't see how they'd fit in another responsibility."

4 Match your expectations for contact to your agency's focus. For example, if you state you want very little or no contact, you may be in for a long wait if your agency is known for fully open adoptions. "We went to an open adoption agency because we wanted SOME contact," say birthparents Heather and Jason, "so we rejected a couple who wanted us to disappear after the birth."

5 Accurately represent yourselves and avoid playing to your audience. One birthmother might love dogs while another might be allergic. One might want the baby to be the couple's first, while another might want the baby to have older siblings. To bring about the best match simply be truthful about who you are and what your lives are about.

6 Be brutally honest about your profile. Better yet, have a trusted friend – someone less vested in the outcome – look over your masterpiece before turning it in to your agency. Ask this person to be candid about the photos, letters, and tone. Maybe you can't see that Aunt Tillie looks awful in that family photo, but you need to know. "In one picture, taken at a family picnic, they all had red eye," explains Gwen. "I know it was just the photo, but my impression was ‘how demonic!'"

7 Tinker. Advertisers know that tweaking just a word or an image can dramatically change results. If you've been waiting a while, make a minor change, like the stationery or the lead photo. "If your agency is having activity but your profile isn't garnering interest, a semi-annual review with minor changes might help," suggests Karen Bettis, Adoption Counselor at Lutheran Family Services.

8 Get exposure. Become an ambassador for your agency. Keep pregnancy counseling brochures in your car so you can post them at libraries and community centers (with permission). Your own doctor can be a resource to her patients who are pregnant but can't parent – if she has brochures. And to stretch your geographic boundaries, post your profile online. An internet search on "adoption profiles" turns up a host of sites that match birthparents and adoptive families.

To pursue adoption, especially for people who have achieved success in other areas of their lives, is to give up control. I like the idea that the profile makes a difference, that it helps you take back just a little bit of that control you may have lost. While you may have little influence on the activity level of the agency, you can make sure that birthparents who do come in see you in your best light.

Gathering Idea's for our Adoption Photo Album for the Birth Mom ~

2011-02-17T14:07:00.001-08:00

How to select photos for your adoption profile

“Every Picture Tells A Story… Don’t It?” Besides being the refrain from a popular song it is the rule you should follow when choosing photos for your Adoptive Family Profile. Your profile will be the single most important tool you have when networking for birthparents, and you shouldn’t waste a single inch on photos that don’t share something significant about your family.

When a potential birthparent (PBM) looks at a profile the photos will be the first thing that captures her eye. Before she reads a word she will scan the photos, and she will already have an impression of your family before she reads the opening sentence. A birthparent will most likely sit down with a stack of profiles, pick up the first and flip through without reading. A photo may catch her eye, and she stops. She will read the text around the photo and then, if you capture her interest, she will read the profile front to back. A thought to remember is that while you will be counseled to keep the text of a profile simple as a PBM may not have had the opportunity for education, photos will speak volumes about your family without requiring her reading a single word.

A birthmother’s thought process when culling through a stack of profiles is very much like what you may do when you visit a bookstore just to browse. You walk, full of anticipation, to the new releases table. You walk around the table slowly, just looking at the covers. A book with an evocative cover catches your eye, and you stop. You pick it up, and read the words on the cover. The photo or cover design sets the tone, and before you begin reading you know what to expect. You may flip to the notes on the author, you may read the inside cover, or if you are like me you flip the book open to the center and read a few lines. You get an instant impression about the writing style, tone, and feel of the book. Based on this you may choose to buy the book, or you put it in the mental “hold” pile and keep browsing.

As adoptive parents when we create our profiles the first thing we do is struggle with the text. We read tons of other profiles, we read books on writing profiles, and we labor over the text. We write, we rewrite, we throw it all away and we start writing again. At long last we get a draft we are happy with, and then we turn our thoughts to the photos. Text will get perhaps 10-20 hours of your attention, while the process for choosing photos is often thumbing through a stack of photos, pulling out the ones where we don’t look fat or cross-eyed and heading out to Kinko’s to copy them on a single page and we call it a day.

Photos count. They count so much, in fact, that they ought to get our immediate attention. My advice is that from the very second you begin to consider adoption start getting “candid” photos of yourselves. Head out to every social event with a camera in your purse and ask people to take a few shots of you both. You will, naturally, hate the way you look in at least half of them, your spouse will hate a few others, and you will eventually have a group of ten or fifteen to use in your profile.

When I think about photo selection I break the process down into WHAT, WHEN, and WHY. First, What are the photos of? When was it taken, and Why should we include it?

WHAT: Most if us don’t go around snapping photos of ourselves. We have photos of our kids (if we are already parents), we have photos of our pets, our wedding, vacations and of our spouse doing interesting things. As an interesting side note; family photos are always lopsided. When I review photo packets from prospective parents I can always tell who “owns” the camera, one spouse is always over-represented! It somehow feels narcissistic to take photos of ourselves unless we are on vacation and standing in front of a landmark. You will need ten fun photos of you as a couple, and if they are all vacation photos a PBM will think you do noting but travel. The WHAT list wouldn’t be complete without a list of must haves: photos of your home, a nursery if you have one decorated, you participating in your favorite hobbies, at least six good shots of you and your partner; and you having fun with important people in your life. An important note, make the last set of photos of you doing something, not lined up in a row smiling. Be baking, be skiing, be working on your car, be having fun. Show your style and interests through these photos!

WHEN: I’ve reviewed many profiles where the photos are old, grainy and have a brown tint to them- a dead give away they are more than five years old. Do not include photos that are of poor quality. Just don’t; no matter how good the memory is that that the photo represents. Old photos make us look old…to a young birthmother she may well be reminded of photos she has seen in her parents albums. Not a great impression! Your photos ought to represent the current you, not you ten years ago and certainly not you as a teenager.

Wedding photos are the most often asked about photos, and my answer is almost always NO. Why not? First, our weddings were often years and years ago, and the photos date us. (The big dress and fluffy hair are a dead give-away!) Secondly, what does the photo really say about you? As emotionally attached as we are to our own wedding photos they frankly all look alike, and the space can be much better used on a candid, fun, lively photo. An exception is when your wedding photos are unusual in some way, and really tell a story about how you live you life. An example is in the profile of a current client: she is a ski instructor, and they skied down the hill from wedding to reception. Now that’s a story!

WHY: This is the most important question to ask. WHY should I include a certain photo? Remember, your photos should evoke emotion, and looking at the group of them together should give a certain feeling about who you are as a family. Capture fun, happy moments on film and your photos will dance off the page. What a great impression to leave a PBM! Several photos of you and your cousins lined up in front of a Christmas tree tells a PBM you have family, and that is about it. Several of these in a profile make it feel like looking through a strangers photo album. (Yawn!)

The bottom line? Gather your photos and your partner, and start asking the hard questions. Watch for background objects that distract from your photos (beer cans, bra straps etc.), and be judicious with cropping out unnecessary clutter in photos. Photos tell the story of your life, so be thoughtful and conscientious in your selection and arrangement.
_______________

Appt's today !

2011-02-16T14:39:00.001-08:00

We had our Health check ups from our primary care doctor and she wrote us a letter from her standpoint . It was all good on both ends, we are both healthy and more then EVER ready to have Child #5.. Our furbabies are our treated just like kids but with tails !!! lol ...

well we also went to see an infertility therapist to make sure I am fully ready to move forward with the adoption journey !!! She cleared me and said we are more then ready to move forward onto this wonderful journey of adoption. We just can't express how much we are excited and appreciative of my parents for giving us this wonderful gift. Well they are getting a gift too which is going to be BEYOND SPOILED grandchild. Can't wait to meet our child....

We called the adoption agency today after our therapy session to give her the news about the therapy and she will be hearing soon from the therapist and will be getting the letter as early as next week .. But she told us that she is meeting with the Director of social services today to discuss our case and will be giving us a answer if they are going to accept our home study agency or not.

stay tunned ~~~

~jen

A Adoption poem we found on another blog ~It's very cute and heart warming !

2011-02-12T17:47:00.000-08:00

I didn't give you the gift of life,
But in my heart I know.
The love I feel is deep and real,
As if it had been so.

For us to have each other
Is like a dream come true!
No, I didn't give you
The gift of life,
Life gave me the gift of you.

Posted by QingLu Mama her blog :
http://tomakefreidman4.blogspot.com/2010/11/adoption-love.html

~Jen

Baby Boy's Nursery Idea

2011-02-11T10:57:00.000-08:00

Made some appts for our Pre adoption criteria's ~

2011-02-11T10:51:00.000-08:00

I made an Appt for Jose & I to see an infertility therapist on web Feb 16th, 2011 at 1pm.

But then before that We are going to see our Primary Doctor to get health physical's so she can write us a letter for Both of us for our adoption process, This is at 9:30am & 9:45am. Then we just have to wait to do our finger printing when the adoption agency's tell's us either they will make an acception for our home study agency or not. If Not, then we must get another homestudy done.

Can't wait~ THis is so exciting to actually start this process and not look back and keep on going !!!! YAY !!!

~Jen

Still waiting ...

2011-02-07T17:43:00.000-08:00

We talked to ERIN from our adoption agency and she told us that we need a letter from our marriage therapist. So we called and emailed him and told him we need a letter and it was time senative. Also she needs to talk with me, because Jose has been the only one she has talked to . lol
We needed to tell our home study social worker that it's ok for her to release info to our adoption agency. So hopefully this week we can get all this done and the letter will be done by our therapist.

Crossing fingers, We don't need anymore ROAD BLOCKS... we are SOOO ready to get on the waiting LIST for a birth mommy.. we want to be parents STAT !!! waiting is hard !!!

-Jen

Chop Suey by Glenna Jean - Crib Set For Liam's Room (if it's a BOY)

2011-02-05T17:52:00.000-08:00

Chop Suey by Glenna Jean - Crib Set

Painting idea's for walls:

My Fertility letter for our Adoption Agency ~

2011-02-05T16:54:00.000-08:00

February 3, 2011

To Whom It May Concern:

Jose and Jennifer Toro have been under my care for infertility since September 2008. After diagnostic testing, her cause for infertility was determined to be premature ovarian failure as evidenced by Day 3 FSH of 46, Anti Mullerian Hormone of <0.1 and an antral follicle count of 1. Despite the extremely poor prognosis, Jose and Jennifer elected to attempt several Ovarian Stimulation/Insemination cycles without success.

Cycle Summary
• Cycle One: (1/10): Letrozole 5 mg Cycle Day 3-7; ovulation occurred on Cycle Day 10 with Intrauterine Insemination two days later. The cycle was unsuccessful.
• Cycle Two (2/10): Letrozole 5mg Cycle Day 4-8; Menopur 75 IU Cycle Day 7-12 and then Menopur was increased to 150 IU Cycle Day 13-15. Jennifer was monitored with ultrasounds and estrogen levels but unfortunately did not ovulate that cycle.
• Cycle Three (11/10): Clomid 100mg Cycle 4-8; she ovulated and had timed relations but unfortunately did not conceive.

Throughout her fertility cycles, Jennifer tolerated all procedures and medications well. Despite receiving the unexpected news of her premature ovarian failure, she maintained a calm, positive outlook and dealt well emotionally with each attempt. Her diagnosis and treatment never appeared to impact her daily life negatively; she maintained a full time job and she and Jose always appeared to have a strong marriage. Aside from her infertility, Jennifer has no acute or chronic health conditions. At this point, she appears to have above average life expectancy having been screened for diabetes, hypertension, liver and kidney disorders and all gynecological health screens.

I strongly feel that Jennifer and Jose would make excellent parents. Her infertility condition will not, in my opinion, negatively impact the life of an adopted child. They are no longer pursuing fertility treatment and I am endorsing them as applicants as adoptive parents.

Sincerely,

Mark Trolice, MD

Taiwan Program

2011-02-05T16:50:00.000-08:00

ADOPTION PROGRAMS

Taiwan Program

Taiwan Now Accepting Applications!

AGCI is happy to announce that we are now accepting applications for our pilot adoption program in Taiwan! As this is still in the pilot stage, interested families must have complete flexibility as elements of the program are subject to change.

Behind the breathtaking landscapes and modern cities of Taiwan hides the fact that up to 50% of all Taiwanese women have had an abortion, due to the stigma associated with being an unwed mother. Experts now say the yearly abortion rate exceeds the birthrate. To provide hope for these unborn babies, AGCI has launched a pilot adoption and birth mother program, reaching out to bring a beacon of light and life to this majestic island.

Children Available
Children ages two months and older are available for adoption.

Care In-Country
All God's Children International has partnered with Deana Pan, a dedicated American citizen living in Taiwan, to help women and children in crisis. With a shared vision, AGCI and Deana have developed Morning Light Home, a safe haven for birth mothers to live during their pregnancy, offering pre- and post-natal care, counseling, job training, and the opportunity to choose and meet the adoptive families.

AGCI has also opened a Hannah's Hope home for children as they wait to be united with their forever families. Hannah's Hope is one-of-a-kind, providing love, shelter, and safety to orphans who are waiting to be placed in loving homes. Hannah's Hope focuses on giving each child personalized attention by providing a "special mother" for every three to four children.

Time Frame
The approximate time frame of our Pilot Taiwan Birth Mother program, from application through finalization of an adoption, is 12 to 28 months

Link to the adoption agency site that I got this from :

Bento Box's websites ~

2011-02-05T12:43:00.000-08:00

We are so excited that Jose has already begun to start looking for bento box idea's for our lil one's.. YAY !!!

http://en.bentoandco.com/

Baby Toro Folder ~

2011-02-05T11:24:00.001-08:00

Yep, my parents made there grandbaby a folder for the adoption journey stuff.

Application Process & A little Road block we ran into...

2011-02-02T17:58:00.001-08:00

Jose is finally doing the application on the adoption agency's website.

So we found out that our home study agency isn't a Hague accredited. But our adoption agency that we are going with is a Hague accredited. SO the lady we are dealing with at the adoption agency sent a detailed email for why and what happen to the home study agency the reasons why they aren't Hague accredited to the director of social services to review our case and hopefully accomidate us fairly. If they can't then we will have to go with a Hague accredited home study agency that the adoption agency works with. It's like our 2800.00 that we paid back in 2009 for our one with florida home study just is about to go down the drain. IT's just a bit frustrating. So we are just waiting to hear the response from the Director of social services and see what they say about our case...

Fingers are crossed ~
~Jen

Boy and Girl Names !

2011-01-31T16:26:00.000-08:00

For Boys' name so far :

Liam (still looking for middle name)
-Origin:Irish
-Meaning:Strong Willed Warrior

For Girls' name so far:
Chloe
-Origin:Greek
-Meaning:Verdant and Blooming

Leighton,Leyton
-Orgin:English
-Meaning:

Lien (middle name)
-Origin:Chinese
-Meaning:Lotus

Mei-Lien
Origin:Chinese
Meaning: Beautiful Lotus

Paperwork & Application Fee Paid ! Yippie

2011-01-31T13:35:00.000-08:00

OMG, OMG, OMG, I can't believe this is truely happening .. SOMEONE please wake me up !!!! lol ...

Ok, well just called my HR department and the HR rep is typing a letter and mailing it to me and my hubby emailed his HR person to send him a letter of verifation. WHOOOOO .

Ok, also My step father paid for the application fee with our adoption agency. So we are going to fill out the application online tonight when jose gets home. How exciting.

OMG, OMG this is just so exciting finally we are going to be parents.. THis is going to be just priceless and also even better to see my parents get to be grandparents.. I just can't wait...

So jose just called me and he called in the application fee payment and WE HAVE A SPOT , I guess they only take 15 couples a year and we were couple #14. YAY !!! thank you so much to my parents !!!!!

What a happy day !!! I am wanting to just cry my eyes out I am SO HAPPY with relief and JOY !!!

Things to do and Redo...

2011-01-31T09:41:00.000-08:00

We have to do somethings over because it's been over 6 months since we had them done, but we will be moving along well now that we will be getting funded thanks to my parents. So we emailed our agency and homestudy contacts and they sent us back things we need to redo and to finish and we also told them we are going with "ALL GODS CHILDREN" and going with a Taiwan baby. We can't pick gender but we will be very happy with a wonderful baby in our arms.

So the process has began this week and we are just starting to get all the paperwork pulled up and filled out and will be doing our photo album (our brag book). So once things get approved and get more done , I will keep things updated.

I still can't believe this is finally happening..... Someone please wake me up !! lol

~Jen~

Got Great News from My Parents !

2011-01-30T20:12:00.000-08:00

Well after dealing with and struggling and thinking how we are going to make it where we can finally get our finances together and be able to fit a LOAN in for Adoption. We were going to do it some how some way this year ! Went and saw my parents yesterday and was getting asked some things from my step dad and was asking me about IVF and what's going on and if I was considering it still with a donor egg. I told him I thought about it and talked with mom about it and I figured with almost the same amount of money taken out for a loan for IVF or Adoption and with IVF with donor egg and not knowing if I will have a successfull pregnancy knowing that it may or may not work where I may be with a child or not 9 months later. SO I decided to think about the better and big picture that adoption is best suited for my situation and what I have been dealing with infertility. I know when I made my mind up about adoption and know that I will HAVE a baby at the end of the journey is much better vs. Ivf with donor egg and not knowing if we will make it to full term or not.

Ok anyways My parents called my hubby and I tonight and told me to put the call on speaker phone so we did and they said they are going to FUND the WHOLE adoption for us . I said ARE you serious and are you sure ? they said "YES, we want more then anything to give you and jose the gift of life", also they really want a grandchild to spoil rotten. OMG, I started to cry I couldn't believe this and I was sad and felt bad but I was then again very very thankful for them once again finding a way to help us achieve a very special journey ! SO here we come baby TORO . If it's a girl or a boy they are going to be loved and spoiled with a loving home and family.. We just can't wait til the day we get the referral call NOW..

WE are so blessed to have great parents to support us in every way possible as much as they can. We are very appreciative of My mom and step father.

The JOURNEY OF ADOPTION is SOON to start FOR REAL and will be soon couting the days til we bring the lil toro home !!!

Thank you up there for looking out for us and helping us get through these tought times .

~Jen~

Happy New Year 2011 ~~~

2011-01-01T19:30:00.000-08:00

Well 2010 is gone and will never come back, wow what a year !!! Well we are sure hoping for GREAT things in 2011 . Before summer we are going to have the adopition process rolling and yep will have got a adoption loan and will apply for grants as we can . But we are set and ready for parenthood. We have had a long 3 years or more with infertility issues and just kept hope alive but not enough. So we are so dead set on adoption for our first child and when it's time for us if we are able to bare our own god will take us there but until then we are going to help a lil one in need of wanting to be loved and charished with a supportive and loving home. We can't wait to start this process again and continue on this adoption journey. 2011 is going to be good, we will be on a waiting list for Tawain !!! yep Tawain and we aren't going anywhere else, we can select gender and since we have a girls room all ready we want a girl ! WE can't wait to be parents and yep we have waited a bit for this time to finally come . So we will update again when we look into things more and get info .

take care and hope everyone had a great christmas and happy new year !!!

xoxo
Jen & Jose and Furbabies :)

Some baby clothes we got on sale a few weeks ago...

2010-01-17T15:49:00.001-08:00

These are our very first purchase for the lil princess we are HOPING to get !!!

~jen~

A Sneak Peek at the Custom Closet Jose has been putting up for Baby !!!

2010-01-17T15:32:00.000-08:00

Freshly Painted House Inside - Yay!!!

2010-01-16T09:56:00.000-08:00

Ok,Everyone Finally I am going to post some pic's i took of our "Freshly Painted interior ". The Only rooms we didn't touch were the closets and the computer room which we might turn that into a play room or for Baby#2 and of COURSE we didn't touch The Princess's room . So here are the House Pic's ... Yay !!!

We are meeting the Birth Mommy today for the 1st Time...

2010-01-16T07:51:00.000-08:00

Meeting #1 - we are so excited but we are also scarred/nervous and want her to love us and tell us we are the ones that will love and raise her precious gift growing inside of her belly. We are meeting at 2pm so wish us luck..

well update you when we get back tonight ...

to be continued .........

~Jen~

The Car Seat and Matching stuff to go along with it !!

2010-01-16T07:08:00.000-08:00

Ok I am posting Playpen, highchair, carseat, diaper bag and whatever else that is matching to the carseat Graco "Besty" It's pink and brown. This is the set we are planning on getting for Chloe. We wanted the Sakura Blossom print, but Graco no longer makes that one!

Our Stroller We are going to get ~ check it out !!!

2010-01-16T07:01:00.000-08:00

One of our fellow blogger moms is a stroller fanatic and she gave us the in's and out's of what are the best and the worst of strollers out on the market currently.. Thanks So much Ramona (of Two baby Bos - Mother to Mikey and Jaden!) !!! THIS IS the Stroller of all strollers.. B-O-B Revolution ~ Pink and Brown of course those are the Princess's Colors !!!
There is soo many acessories for this stroller isn't insane.. YAY!!! Those are just the few i found for this stroller ..

It's a Cute Beast.. lol

Check out the "Bling Nuk" we got at SMOOCHES ..

2010-01-16T06:56:00.000-08:00

We got this Nuk when we went to go look at "The Dash" and "Smooches" in Calabasas CA . We fell in love with this when we were there looking. We went to there durning our HONEYMOON trip in 2008.. Only the Best for Our Princess Someday god will bring us..

So you all can stay in touch with us!

2010-01-14T02:54:00.001-08:00

Hey everyone, I know our blog has been a little slow but hopefully things will be ramping up shortly! Last night as I was modifying my Android phone I got to thinking. Barcode scanning is pretty popular for phones now a days. That tied in with the fact that may people browse the web from their phones, and I'm not a huge fan of typing in sites on my phone, led me to create a easier way. If anyone wants to jump to our page from your phone (iphone, blackberry, or Android phone) I've created a QR barcode that will lead you straight to our site!

It makes it easy for your to link to us on our phone or share the link to others. I'd encourage everyone to make one! You can find the generator here: http://qrcode.kaywa.com/

These codes can be used to share a phone number, website address, or setup an SMS text msg! You can even put FULL txt posts in QR!

HOMESTUDY DONE!!!

2010-01-11T16:49:00.000-08:00

Just figured we'd update everyone!

We were visited by our homestudy agent, Lori, on Saturday! It was a day full of stress, chaos, and excitement!

First, we have been painting the whole house since the week prior. We used to have each room a different color and well... We though with an adoption planned we wanted our house to symbolize our lives and show a unity throughout. No chaos, nothing. Well, let me tell you, that is the LAST time Jen or I are painting this house! We were painting up till 5 minutes before Lori arrived and were rushing around the house to get the electrical plates and light switches back on the wall.

In the craziness we actually took some laundry (bed sheets) and shoved them in the closet since we didn't have time to finish... yeah we ended up having to rewash again!

The homestudy went without a hitch, our doggies were so well behaved despite our fears. Lori was a sweetheart and we felt that it could not have gone more smoothely!

So now, onto some different news. We are switching things up and have been offered a chance to adopt locally! While it wasn't the international adoption we had planned it was an amazing opportunity we could not pass up!

We were put in contact with a young girl who's mother works with Jen. She is due May 2nd or before, and just is not quite ready to take on motherhood. In coming to that realization we have been approached by Jen's co-worker (grandma to future said baby).

We are meeting the birth mother this coming week and are excited. If things go great we will have baby number one SOON! and couldn't be happier about it!

After this is done, we will then re-embarq on our quest for our 2nd child once again looking abroad!

We will keep you all up to date as soon as we know more!

I will probably let Jen post the house photos since well..... i'm lazy and don't have them >_<

-Jose-

Just a break to post some recent photos!

2009-12-29T10:39:00.000-08:00

And yes, before anyone thinks anything wrong... I did get jen's approval to post the pic of her! lol

Needless to say she wasn't too happy waking up to find the photo taken, but she thought it was adorable soon enough!

2009-12-29T10:00:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone,

This is my situation that I’m going through. Please chime in with advice, especially if anyone has been through this situation of adopting a child of someone you work with. We are excited about the situation but are also proceeding with caution.

We are possibly doing a domestic adoption, my coworker has a 17 yr old daughter that is pregnant and she doesn't want to keep the baby and asked me right away if I’d like to adopt the child. She knew I couldn't have children and wanted a child so bad. But they aren't going through a adoption agency, they are wanting just to have us go through a adoption lawyer of which my husband and I have a consult with Jan 4th to see what our options are and ask our concerns. The coworker and her daughter aren't asking for money just to give the baby a good loving home, but she said her daughter will sign her rights up and same with the father. She told me they talked to the father and he said he would sign his rights away. That's why we want a lawyer, to get all the bells and whistles covered completely so nothing happens.

She is due in May 2010, we don't have a set date yet but I think next visit she will get one.

I am excited if everything pans out right, but a bit nervous as well.

She said she is clean and doesn’t smoke or drink. She is in school. She doesn’t want the baby and when heather, [her mom and my coworker at ATI (my parent’s business)] found out that she was pregnant 4 months ago, it was so sweet she thought of me right away because Christina her daughter said she doesn’t want the baby and she was going to abort it, but her mother said no I have someone that I would love to ask that can’t have children at work. I wanted to cry it was very sweet of her to think of me. Let me tell you they don’t live a perfect life, they have issues like we all do. The father of the baby is in jail for being with friends at the wrong place at the wrong time, his friends robbed a store and he got in trouble because he was with. We were told that he said he would sign his rights up and he just wanted the baby to go to a good home.

I’ve been diagnosed with premature ovarian failure, at age 32, and will not be able to conceive. My co worker heather told me the other people that were going to adopt Christina’s baby can’t afford a adoption lawyer so after we talked I talked to my mom and told her the situation and mom said to ask her if she would talk to Christina and ask if she has plans for anyone else to adopt the baby. She isn’t going through an agency just she wants to sign her rights over that’s it she said. So here we are and now waiting till Jan 4th appt with lawyer. To see what are the chances we are taking by entering in an adoption with a yet to be born child.

She is taking pre natal vitamins and she goes to the doctor when she is suppose to and she lives with her aunt right now and she is getting fed well, her aunt makes good money heather said, I forgot what she does. Heather, her mom, lives with her boyfriend and her son at her boyfriend’s friend’s house, they are looking for a place to move into.

Once we meet the lawyer on Jan 4th, I will find out the fee’s and tell her the situation and the lawyer is the one that will go to the jail and get the father to sign the legal documents to relinquish his rights.

Heather said Christina loved the idea about us taking the baby. She doesn’t want contact just as long as we could send pics. We have hurt a lot in this process of finding out I can’t bear children and we would hate to have that feeling taken away all over again. IT’S A GIRL too so it would be CHLOE LIEN TORO. You can tell I am so excited and hope all pans out.

So we are waiting and if things don’t pan out we are going back to the original plan of adopting from Taiwan. Even if this does go through, we are looking to start the process after for international adoption of our second child. I would really love to do the donor egg and take that chance but we don’t have the money to gamble like that. I would love to be pregnant, it just sucks that they punish the ones that can’t have children and make them pay A LOT of money. It’s insane. But if you want a child you have to do it…

Thank you

Jennifer :)

Finally we have a "Date" set for Our Homestudy With Lori our Social Worker..

2009-12-11T06:26:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone,

yep we actually have a date set for Sat Jan 9th, 2010 at 12:30 for our Homestudy.. YAY !!!! well we had to reschedule a few times due to some BUMPS in the road but we are staying with jan 9th, 2010 and that way we will have the homestudy done and move forward finally. We aren't billionaires but we are going to make this work and we want more then anything to be parents and Jewel, Trisden, Sakura and Bella want a buddy to play with and sleep by.. those are our dogs aka: kids .. They are spoiled rotten and can't wait to spoil the New Addition .. We will finally be a happy family soon ..

To fill you in a bit with my Infertility issues:

On Friday Dec 4th, 2009 :
We went for a consult to talk to Dr. Trolice (my Fertility Doctor) and he had some bad news. He told us that I couldn't bare any children . I was extremely upset , he said i have Pre mature ovarian failure which is pre menapausal. So he told us about our options were to egg donor and adoption and we told him since he told us last time when they did blood testing on i got results for an ovarian aging was a -7 and i guess normal range is + numbers so it was a low egg reserve. So i was just hoping , but i guess god wanted me to find another way to have a child (where ever it may be from),which my husband and I are going to do if we have support or not. I just hope with all the emotional, mental and physical stress this has caused and all the bumps we have had together that my family will support me especially my DAD and BROTHER :) ... I am so close to my brother and i don't ever ever want to lose that bond even though he is overprotective and stuff but that's my brother. But also DAD i want you to be proud of you being a grandpa to whatever background it is .. I love you dad and jeremy and want you both to be apart of this journey with us and be happy and let us be parents and continue on with the adoption plans and just be a support system as well as an uncle and grandpa !!! thank you love you so much !!!

Thank you for all the support bloggers and family and please continue this journey we are finally about to begin ..

Step 1 : selling my husband's 2006 BMW 650i Convertible (his dream car)

To be continued ......

xoxo
~ Jennifer :)

Just a minor update: Financing adoption

2009-12-10T07:57:00.000-08:00

So, through this whole process Jen and I were always wondering how we were going to finance this adoption. We've done several steps and were able to start paying things off (homestudy paid so far is a nice start).

We have been scared though with the economy about the rest of the adoption as with the sinking housing market we can't borrow against our home like many people I've talked to have done.

So next best thing. I'm selling my car... I know it seems like deja vu, I sold one car previously already during this journey and that went to the homestudy and other fees. But this car was the one that was supposed to be my dream car. I have new dreams now, I want to be a dad at any cost.

I'm actually sort of excited because if this sells decently then the adoption should almost be fully paid!

It's been up on craigslist and should finally post to autotrader today or tomorrow! Jen sort of feels bad about me getting rid of the car I was wanting, but I'm actually ok with it! I'm really excited to have what in my mind was the biggest hurdle of any adoption done and over with!

So... That's it for now I guess, Keep you all informed soon hopefully!

-Jose-

We are still alive!

2009-11-22T21:22:00.000-08:00

Well.. just a note to everyone out there in blog land, we are still alive! Contrary to what our blog has shown, we've been alive kicking and active.

Unfortunately it's been Jen and I dealing with changes in our lives. Everything from work, to family, to friends everything has been changing sometimes ever so slightly, and other times not so much.

Soon I will give a more formal update I promise you all! Till then I wish you all the best. Hopefully we will be able to share some good news, just busy trying our hardest to kick the bad news to the curb!

-Jose-

Stress, Complications, and Confusion

2009-09-15T07:16:00.000-07:00

So, some of you out there in the blogosphere might have been wondering where our updates have been. I have to admit, I’ve been a bad blogger recently! Things in our little slice of this world has been interesting to say the least.

To re-cap the past 2 months:

1) I found out I’m getting laid off Oct. 1st

2) We had to put our adoption on hold, as costs were starting to add up, and the job situation was being thrown into chaos.

3) AFTER we had put our adoption on hold, we were approached by someone to adopt their child, (she was 2 ½ months pregnant)

4) We got on a natural high and back in the swing of things excited as all heck!

We are hoping and praying to everything we can that things find their path. I’ll tell you though, as I’ve been on the job hunt, it sucks feeling helpless! I mean, with my background and expertise in sales, marketing, management, technical support, 3d graphics… I thought something should surface but as of yet nothing. I’ve even looked at jobs requiring travel thinking that would broaden my chances but still no luck.

Jennifer has since applied to another job with a hospital (it’ll be her first job back in a hospital since her car accident that left her with herniated discs [they’ve since been fixed]).

I write this actually as I sit at work reflecting on what steps we need to take as a family to ensure that the end goals are accomplished. We are trying to take it day by day… but eh stress can be overwhelming.

On a side note I have to say, I’ve been reading a book on Buddhism and it’s been putting my mind at peace, at least while I read it!

Hope things are well for all my friends out there! We will land on our feet so don’t worry about us ^_^! Just it’s never fun when livelihood is threatened.

Till we know more I’ll probably just post the goings on of our life.
We love you all!

Jose & Jen

Wating for the LSW to call US !!!!

2009-07-01T07:34:00.000-07:00

Geeesh, Waiting is the pits sometimes.. I know this whole waiting process will give us a Beautiful crying, peeing, pooping baby !!! i can't wait !!!! But the homestudy place received our papers and check . They assigned us to a social worker and we ARE PATIENTLY waiting for her to call us !! but we have been waiting only 2 days and we are going a bit nuts.. we want her to call !!!! we want to start this home study process ASAP !!!

P.s. If anyone has any info on any good length adoption loans please let us know the info on that, we have ones in mind and talked to 2 already but they are 5 ish year loans and we want to see if we can find a LONGER time frame if at all possible if not then we will have to do with the 5 year one.

Thanks again for all the supporters of the blog mommies and family and friends !!!
we really appreciate the encouragement from everyone....

have a great 4th of july weekend everyone !!!

xoxo
Jennifer

Nursery Chair Rail done + MORE!

2009-06-28T18:45:00.000-07:00

Well... Thanks to Juan and Alicia who came over today the chair rail has been knocked out! We had opted to not due crown as we though it would take away from the height of the room... (ceilings only about 8 ft)

1) Image of TV wall where the Diaper changing table is, and our vase with the Sakura Blossoms (you'll see this as a re-occurring theme)

2) Our Crib w/Migi Sakura blossom Sheets/Comforter/Side skirt/bumper/mobile/and throw blanket

3) Another view of the Crib, you can see the closet off to the right (still brainstorming ideas for that one).

4) Open view of the room. Above the blinds is the Migi Sakura blossom window valance.

5) A close-up view of the Window valance showing the Sakura Blossom details. (btw disregard the fact that it's wrinkled, everything was put up for photo shoot and test placement, so we need to wash and Iron!)

6) Close up of the Sakura blossom floral arrangement in our rattan vase. This arrangement was put together by my sister Lizzie for our wedding shower! I think it would have a beautiful home here amongst the other details.

7) Sakura blossom floral/Rattan Vase, under Migi Sakura valance.

8) Up close of Bedding set to show detail. Everything in the room is Sakura blossoms, Our Miniature Pinscher is even named Sakura! All the dogs love the room!

9) Proof that even our dogs are ready for a little one! Bella adamantly protecting the diaper changing table... If anyone gets near the baby, she is ready to defend!

NURSERY IS PAINTED!!!!!!

2009-06-28T09:22:00.001-07:00

Ok, so we are rounding the corner on one of the last phases of our Nursery!!!

It's been officially painted, and as we speak one of my best friends Juan, is coming over to help me install Chair and Crown moulding in the room!!!

Below you will find the photos of the rooms progression since our last post!

1) Jewel - our Dalmatian supervising my work!

2) Facing the side of our house - Started taping with "blue painters tape" But re-did all the tape work to Green "frog tape" It is AMAZING and I will never use blue painters tape again. When I did the bottom half of the room I found the brown bled a little through the edges of the blue tape. This green tape keeps perfectly cut clean lines, its' amazing! (and it comes in it's own canister for storage and was only less than a dollar more than the other tape, well worth it for the lack of stress!)

3) Facing towards inside of house into the Hallway - to the right is the Office, and the door you see through the doorway is the "Jack n Jill" Bathroom.

4) The closet, inside the closet will change as well. We currently have the wire racks that most new homes are given by their builders.

5) View of the big wall where the Crib will go against -and some of my masterful tape work. Thankfully my wife Jen kicked in and helped with the taping because man it was taking FOREVER! Btw, the lines look like they aren't straight but it's just the camera and weird angles. Mental note - D-SLR before baby gets here...

6) Last photo of taped room before you see the finished product below!

7) As you can see, it's morning and the Green tape is off!!! WOOHOO!!! It turned out!

The photos don't do the wall justice, these stripes are almost an illusion as they are the exact same color pink, just one stripe done in flat paint, and then another in semi gloss. It is a great look going into the room because the stripes sort of fade in and out as the light hits them in different ways!

8) A good example of what I was speaking of above, as you see when the light hits the center of the strips they become very pronounced, but as it fades off so do the stripes. Such a cool look I think! Thanks to the internet for having people share ideas and DIY techniques!

Sent off Application for Homestudy on Wednesday June 24th, 2009

2009-06-27T08:08:00.001-07:00

We Sent off our Homestudy application with the correct amount check that we were told to send and along with 2 pic's of jose and I . We offically as of June 24th, 09 started moving more foward with this adoption process. We also are calling banks on adoption loans. So far it's looking good with the places we have talked to .. **Crossing all toes and fingers** I really want to get throught these process's to get us to the waiting list. I am sorry we haven't blogged in a few days , we have been busy. Jose is finishing painting the baby's room today and Tommorrow we are having his best friend come over that is a handy man and help us with crown molding and put new matching base boards up and chair railing .. It's going to look so cute !!! I am going to help decorate the room when it's done. We will be posting more pic's of the room of the process and the completion soon.. stay tuned !!!

Thanks everyone for your kind and great support !! Thanks to all the bloggers (mom's and Dad's) that are helping us through the tough times of this process. (^o^)

Not So good News for us TODAY ! But there is still Much HOPE !!

2009-06-17T11:02:00.000-07:00

Well i received an email from Jose (my hubby) and it was a forward one from Karen from The agency here in florida for Tawain. The email stated that they didn't deny us because of the marriage, they denied us because of the waitinglist. it's sad news, but we are going to go through another agency for Japan since that is still open. we are working with the only adoption agency in the US that does Japan and that's in Cali. So here we go we can finally get our home study process going now. Since we did alot of the finanical papers already and sent them off to try to help the home study process get done in lesser time now. WE did and send everything off, so now we just need to have our vistis with the home study social worker and get that paper work she gives us done and back to her as soon as we get it done. (which will be faster then the ROAD RUNNER , i am sure with how excited we are to get things done and get on the waiting list, LOL ) But we know we can't pick a gender in Japan and we are fine with that, so we are probley not going to finish the upper walls as in finishing in colorwise , so if we get a referral for a baby boy then well paint it blue.. but i will have to see what my silly hubby wants to do, he might just want to finish painting it pink and if we find out we are having a boy then we will re paint it.. yes it's silly but you don't know Jose !! lol ~Gotta Love My Joey (jose) !!

we will finish blogging later about this situation and i am sure jose will have more infor from the agency in cali after calling them for more info today , but just wanted to update you all !

Thanks for following everyone and the support !!

Jennifer (^o^)

FINALLY PHOTOS!!! OMG.. of the nursery!

2009-06-16T19:13:00.000-07:00

So, I've been a bad blogger recently. It's been text text text... I personally hate that! So hard though when you don't have a child, cause I think to myself what can I show? Well finally this past weekend I got cracking on the nursery and I have some updates! I'm going to show tons of photos to make up for my recent lack of them!

And yes I was watching anime while painting.... >_< Also on the suggestion of our cousin, we bought a baby doll to get the dogs used to the fact that we will be adding to our family! So far Trisden our collie has been most receptive, even running to the room and laying by the crib when the doll cries! All the dogs though have come by the doll and seem to be behaving wonderfully!

Not big news, but news none-the-less!

2009-06-13T20:27:00.000-07:00

So, in light of not having heard anything back yet from my agency. We decided to throw caution into the wind and started painting the nursery!!! We were both really excited and couldn't wait to get it all done!... till we started. Man, painting really isn't to fun!

To make matters worse, I got my degree in art, and love painting... but portraits, and this my friends are not portraits!

Well currently i'm priming the whole wall. Hopefully i'll be done tonight, so tomorrow I can start the not as completely boring part of painting the colors!

Moving a bit closer to getting on the waiting list !! YAY !!

2009-06-11T15:07:00.000-07:00

Today We mailed our Criminal History information request and The State of Florida Department of Children and Families -Central Abuse Hotline record. We did a delivery request so we can track it online so we know when it gets there.. SO we have PIECE of mind.. lol

My husband is also filling out a Finanical Statement out for the Home study stuff, to get the process moving faster.. he is a lil pushy to get things done and very MOTATIVATED !!! lol

I am Ready to GO FAST !!!

2009-06-10T15:40:00.000-07:00

GOSH, I love my husband.. He does such a great job blogging.. lol no but really, I am FASTENING MY SEAT BELT..I am ready to proceed !!! let's get it done !!! we are so excited !!! can't wait to get into the process to be able to get on the waiting list !!!

we are filling out our criminal background sheet and doing our Child abuse paperwork !! we are sending it tommorrow !!! YAY !!!

Still CROSSING our FINGERS !!!!

FINALLY!!! It's done, just one more obstacle before it all starts!

2009-06-09T20:02:00.000-07:00

So, one thing that has stood in the way of my adoption recently was my car. I blogged about it earlier, but didn't go into much detail.

Here's the skinny on it. This car was my first that I actually got to choose. It was my first car I bought. It was also the first car I fell in love with. I have to say it's somewhat sad to see it go, but it really was standing in the way. My wife and I both have cars, and this was literally the third wheel (no pun intended)!

So threw it on craigslist unsure of the responses i'd get, and amazingly enough the floodgates opened! I had countless e-mails and inquiries (most didn't seem sincere though). This morning though I read an e-mail that was left over from last night. They asked for my info and wanted to come see it today.

Needless to say... The gentleman, a nice 60 yr. old man (Didn't look it at ALL!!!!) came, cash in hand! Car is now gone, and phase 1 financing of our adoption is basically complete. We now have almost all the money we need up to referral time!!!! w00h00!

Now we just have to wait and pray that we get approved for the Taiwan program. If that happens, home study is being ordered post haste... I'm talking about BLEEDING SPEED, Heads will spin from the sheer speed and efficiency that is going to happen as I tear through paperwork!

Home study hasn't even began, and I already have all my referrals being sent in to me, our employment salary verification letters, background check is waiting to go, Dr.'s visit is ready to be scheduled... I'm not only not waiting for the process to take it's pace, I'm grabbing it by the horns and dragging it at nascar speeds! I was meant to be a dad, My wife was meant to be a mom we are determined... I just hope all the us government can keep up with my speed!

Wanted to say thanks!

2009-06-09T06:05:00.000-07:00

I've just noticed the increase in readership that has recently occured and wanted to thank EVERYONE for your support. I know that it may not seem like much, but visiting our site gives us just that little bit of extra strength and we appreciate it!

It's great to know that there are others on this journey with us! It means a lot!

For our international readers:

Tack för att du besöker -Sweden
Vielen Dank für Ihren Besuch -Germany
Grazie per la visita -Italy

I just noticed we were getting some international attention and that's awesome!

As for our visitor for Japan, i'm pretty sure it's our great buddy Kumi, and just wanted to say as always thank you and Love ya girl! speaking of which I got to get out another e-mail to our little e-mail to KCJJ... (*^_^*). If anyone else is reading in Japan or anywhere else feel free to chime in, I love learning about others cultures!

And for our US visitors, many of you were our sources of strength with your blogs, kind words and support. So thanks for everything!

Ok, now as promised: Nursery Selection!!!

2009-06-08T15:07:00.001-07:00

So as mentioned in a previous post we had several options for decorating the nursery. Several things to be aware of though:

1) We chose the sakura blossom bedding from the previous post (picture below)

2) We will be installing chair rail and frame panels under the chair rail.

With that said, we plan on choosing one of 5 ideas (4th and 5th idea photo is missing) Here in no specific order are the ideas, keep in mind I'm talking about the walls:

We are leaning towards the wall that has the Brown/Pink/White stripes. the other 2 ideas is a pink and white/pink and brown checkerboard look like the background of our blog, or doing the pink burberry plaid on the walls.... Still undecided so chime in and cast your vote for 1-5!!!

Still waiting on the exception!

2009-06-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

Well, I just heard back from my agency. As of yet, we have not heard back if we'd be granted the exception to the 5yr marriage rule. We are hoping since we've been together so long, and the waitlist is rather lengthy that the exception can be made.

We are keeping our fingers crossed, hopefully some good news will fly our way shortly!

Stay tuned on nursery input!

2009-06-08T07:19:00.000-07:00

Hopefully later on today i'll be posting on the nursery ideas we've had, wall design and so forth. We will be making it open to suggestion even though we have so thoughts that we will work off of.

I think we Picked what Nursery Theme we are going to go with today !!!

2009-06-06T22:04:00.001-07:00

The first one is our MUST have because it's of course "sakura Blossom". Plus we agreed to go with Pink and Brown.. So I found 2 different ones with the Nova checker Pink Burberry look alike plaid !! since they don't have the real one anywhere !!! So I do believe we decided on the "sakura blossom" one which is the first picture !!
we are going to do our walls a bit different . we are going to put white chair rails around the whole room and paint pink on top and bottom a lighter brown matching the theme and that contrasts the pink color.. we want it to look elegant and Nice but cute too !!

Home Study and I-600A HELP! ^_^

2009-06-06T15:02:00.001-07:00

Well... we received the official home study application!!! We are very excited but I got to be honest, something in my gut made me think it was here today, so on the way back from running errands I had Jen stop by the mailbox for me to check the mail!

So I guess this is phase 1! Now we are just getting together all the information requested to have ready FOR the home study, all of our medical checks and background clearances for instance.

On another note, I downloaded the I-600a form for international adoption from the government site, and can anyone tell me exactly how to fill it out. I mean, it's self explanatory and all, but it's already asking us about when our travel date is, and I don't even have a referral! Am I just jumping the gun here?

Internationally known!

2009-06-06T09:59:00.000-07:00

So, recently there's been a few comments personally made to us as for our decision to adopt internationally. Some have been good, and some well... not as much! This is how we feel though:

1) If a child is adopted, he/she is given a better home no matter where he/she was from

2) Aren't we supposed to be a GLOBAL society, not confined by our geography?

3) There aren't enough parents adopting ANYWHERE for anyone to say that one area is more important

4) We have choices because we feel it fits our personalities. At first, yes it was "my" personality, but my wife long before we ever thought about adopting started getting into the cultures that I like!

Also there have been some people making assumptions on adoption that are unfounded.

People have said why are we spending so much money to adopt, when in reality international and domestic adoptions are on par with eachother! Also they have made assumptions that we can get a child MUCH faster if we adopt domestically. Once again, in many situations it is up to the birth parent to decide, so timeframes are a mute point, if we never find a matched parent then we have to wait in a line but if we do it can be a fast turn around.

When all is said and done, part of my international want for adoption was to open myself up to another culture. I find that as I will raise an international child, to do right by them, I will have to learn the culture with them and keep it as part of whom they are. My family is very proud of our heritage, and just like we are I wouldn't deny anyone from that!

Just wanted SUPPORT that's all !! But thanks to the ones that do SUPPORT us ...

2009-06-05T11:38:00.000-07:00

Yes, My Husband is right in all of what he has and is saying in this blog and the other ones. I just really wanted SUPPORT that's all !! I told him to take the donation link down because after some tough opinions from people that are close to us, really tore me up inside. I didn't realize that a donation link and wanting to adopt a international baby/child would cause so much heartache... yes, it may be reality but the truth is we really want to be parents and it shouldn't MATTER where we get a baby/child from as long as we are going to be GREAT loving parents !!! Thank you soo much for the people that did donate, we appreciate it !!

(^O^)Jennifer

Can't it all be good?

2009-06-05T10:09:00.000-07:00

Well, as of today the donation link has been taken down. We've received enough negative opinions about the link! So much for just being helping and having the want to help!

For those that saw the donation link let me explain the idea behind it. Being that i'm an internet junkie and have seen crazy ideas blossom and flourish, I thought it would be neat to incorporate that type of involvement in this process. It wasn't without reason that we added though. We have been combatting fertility issues, which in and of itself isn't the most cost effective. With the fact that we haven't yet, and probably can not have a child we've elected to adopt.

Adopting has been something that filled our hearts with joy. The idea of overcoming differences and being able to be a positive role model was great, but it also comes at a cost. Adoption fees weren't expected when we were trying to have a natural pregnancy, so we made no allocation for that! The idea came to fruition that we would ask for an absolutely minimal amount, $1... that's it! Does that sound like we are trying to rob people or get the whole thing paid for? Would I be selling my car if I wanted a full free ride? Would we be applying for adoption loans if we wanted that? No it was an idea that if anyone wanted to be part of it, they could, but oppositely they could also not and just read our blog! What a novel idea I though, well didn't work out so well!

So now, we have taken the donation down. It won't be back up on our blog just to keep those sensitive readers from getting all worked up! IF anyone wanted to help and didn't get a chance to, the link is available but I would request an e-mail to get it : josetoro@cfl.rr.com

I don't want this to be a big issue and fact of the matter is, for those that opposed us, we can and will do it on our own if we must! That's fine with us, we are going to be parents and that's more important than anyone's negative oppinions!

All we ever truely asked for was emotional support... but even that seems few and far in-between and day by day we are getting stronger and just relying on eachother!

On a side note, I want to thank the other bloggers that have gone through this process! Your blogs are a source of strength for us in this confusing time! Keep on blogging, because we will keep on reading!!!

Just waiting!

2009-06-04T22:28:00.000-07:00

Well... now we are waiting to get information on the homestudy. It's both amazing and expected how intricate the adoption process is. There are a HUGE set of checks and balances, although it's going to be no walk in the park, I wouldn't have it any other way!

So hopefully sometime in the coming week we will have homestudy info and can see about starting... I really need to go back and look at my notes to see what else I can be doing to hurry things along.

This weekend Jen and I promised ourselves that we are going to sit down and start designing our photobook! I really want to make one that just jumps off the page and embraces the child that is meant for us! We even have someone through a local friend to translate our comments to Mandarin (official language of Taiwan)! So the book will be made especially for our little one and the people important in their lives!

On a side note, I realize that I currently have no child. My wife and I have come to terms with the fact that not only do we not have a child, but it might be difficult to ever have one naturally. Will we stop the hope of a natural child birth at some point in our lives, no! Right now there, there is love to be given and we are going to find our child! It's funny i've since become RIDICULOUSLY over protective of "our child" even though we have no referral. I guess you could say I am over protective of the spirit of the child that will be filling our void!

Man I just can't wait!

Just an update to my readers!

2009-06-04T21:38:00.001-07:00

I got a message today from the adoption agency, that they think it would be best to password protect this site.

It has to deal with the privacy of the children, and being that one of them will be my future child I am ALL about that!

Now the only thing is... I suck at thinking of passwords! I always use the same 1 or 2 passwords for everything, and those are closer guarded then next weeks lottery numbers or the meaning of life! So as I get a spark of imagination i'll come up with one and post it on here for all my friends and family, and our new extended blogger families out there to have and keep up!!!

By the way, this is my first actual blog, and to be honest it's completely foreign to me (not a pun)!

I don't even keep up with facebook or anything like that! So sorry if it seems a little bit hit or miss, but I promise you i'll definitely be refining my posting styles as time goes. Who knows, I might actually have a shot at being to piece together a regular post without rambling on by the time we get our referral!!!

Starting to think of names!

2009-06-04T16:33:00.000-07:00

Well... today we sat down to think of options of names. We have some ideas and we'll post it as they come to us so keep checking back!

So far the first and only one is for a girl:

Chloe Lien - Meaning "blooming Lotus"

Thoughts?

Starting our search!

2009-06-04T11:55:00.000-07:00

Well recently i've been trolling the web like you wouldn't believe Reading blogs left and right about others experiences and am completely excited about this whole process. We are pretty sure that we have found the BEST company possible in Florida to work with!

Florida Home studies and Adoption, inc.
http://www.flhomestudies.com/

Karen has been helping us and coaching us not only on the process but what to expect. It has really been a big stress relief being able to fall back to someone for actual advice on the laws, rules and expectations!

Hopefully things will go perfectly smooth!

This should bring us much closer to our goals!!!

2009-06-04T10:46:00.001-07:00

Well as of last night, I have listed my car online on craigslist! I never really thought about selling it, not because I wanted to keep it, but i just never saw a need to.

Those days are over though! I'm anxiously awaiting several people that have ALREADY e-mailed about coming to look at and hopefully purchase the car. I will miss it though as it always has been and still is a great running car and really reflected my personality (for those that don't know it's modded to my tastes), but that doesn't matter it's going to a great cause and i'm looking forward to helping make the bar raise!!! I'll post the craigslist link later...

Just a little background....

2009-06-04T05:39:00.000-07:00

Some might be wondering why we are going through the adoption process, or more importantly why we can't conceive naturally. That question has both a simple and diffcult answer.

The simple is that, we have been battling infertility issues. It all started with a hope. One day when we went to see Jen's OBGYN, during a routine visit, we were told that she was pregnant! This came as a shock to us because there were some "oddities" in Jen's normal routine if you will. This got us as excited as could possibly be. Looking back we did the dumb move of telling much of our family right away! During a follow up blood test, we were advised what we were celebrating was all for nothing.

This sparked a fire in us! We were determined that not only were we to become parents, but we'd stand there as the heroes to our children. We wanted to not just raise a child, but to be prime examples of stellar parenting in todays less than dedicated world!

We started to look into infertility treatment and got paired up with an AMAZING doctor! Dr. Trollice is the type of doctor that patients FLY to see from around the country! He holds conferences and seminars, of which we've attended, all on infertility and options!

Working with Dr. Trollice we've found several issues that we had to overcome. Through this process Jennifer has since had to ensure 2 surgical procedures actually cutting away at parts of her body! She also had to deal with medications and other forms of treatment! The clincher though in the situation was that after all was said and done we are still left with one unsurmountable issue. Jennifer has what is known as Advanced Ovarian Aging. This had given us a .5 - 2% shot at ever becoming pregnant. Now these odds are unsurmountable, but at this stage we are playing with fire in a way. As we get older the chances go lower, and we didn't want to play god and force the prenancy.

With the lack of chances, we started looking outwards. I always personally thought i'd adopt atleast one child but never thought it would come so soon! So here we are, documenting our journey through adoption. We figured atleast this way, we would be able to give a great home to a child who needs it, and heck... we've heard plenty of stories of parents having natural children after adopting, so the chance is still there!